每天一笑话，天天乐哈哈。下面是学习啦我们收拾的天天英语幽默笑话，欢迎大伙阅读。
英语幽默笑话1、
A man walks into a confession booth and says,I have sinned.
What did you do?asks the priest.
I committed a murder.
The priest says,take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven.
有一个男性走进告解室说：我犯罪了。 神父 问 ：你做了哪些? 我有谋杀罪神父说：你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。
A man walks into the confession booth and says ,I have sinned.
The priest asks him ,what did you do?
I robbed six banks.
The priest says, take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven.
有一个男性走进告解室说：我犯罪了。神父问他： 你做了哪些?我抢了六家银行神父说：你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饶恕。
Another man walks into the confession booth and says , I have sinned .
What did you do? asks the priest,
I broke the holy cup.
另一个男性走进告解室说：我犯罪了。 神父问：你做了哪些?我把圣杯打破了。
英语幽默笑话2、《律师、宝马和胳膊》
一个律师打开他的宝马车门，忽然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了，警察赶到现场，律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。
警察同志，看看他们把我的车弄的!!!律师哀怨地说。
你们律师真是物质至上，我非常不舒服!警察反驳说，你这么关心你可恶的宝马，你可能没注意到你的左胳膊也没了。
律师终于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀，天哪，我的劳力士手表在什么地方?
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
Officer, look what theyve done to my Beeeemer!!!, he whined.
You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!! retorted the officer, Youre so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didnt even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!
英语幽默笑话3、《狗住旅店》
一个人给一家他计划在假期里停留的小旅馆写了封信，我很期望携带我的狗，它非常干净非常有教养，你能允许它和我睡一间屋子吗?
旅馆主人立即回了封信，我经营旅馆不少年了，狗从没偷过毛巾，床单， 餐具，或者墙上的画。我也从没在半夜由于狗喝醉胡闹而赶走它，狗也从不不付帐就跑掉。事实上大家很欢迎你的狗来大家旅馆，假如它为你担保，也欢迎你来。
A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?
An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, Ive been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, Ive never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. Ive never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And Ive never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, youre welcome to stay here, too.
